Drooling & Coughing

     I understand that God made who I am. I have adapted to my body, but it is disturbing to understand my drooling Drooling like a baby annoys me. You can think what you want, but I want to be honest with you. It is ok if I feel like this because I’m not dwelling on this. Like anyone else, I have a pity party and then move on because I realize God made me in His image.
     I want to share what I found when I was researching my new book to help you understand what caused my drooling. Some people with Cerebral Palsy drool because brain damage affects the muscles and coordination needed to control saliva, leading to difficulty swallowing or poor mouth closure, causing saliva to overflow from the mouth or pool in the throat. It's usually a problem with control, not overproduction of saliva, stemming from weak tongue/lip muscles, poor posture, or reduced sensation, which impairs the normal swallowing reflex.
     There are two types of drooling. Anterior Drooling: Saliva spills from the mouth, causing social embarrassment and skin irritation. And posterior drooling: Saliva pools in the throat, increasing the risk of choking or aspiration pneumonia (saliva entering the lungs).
     I drool on EVERYTHING! I can't handle anything without my drool on it. I don't like to touch anything that is not mine. I would buy things than borrow things. I feel awful when I drool on people.
     For some reason, I don’t feel I’m drooling until I feel it on my chin. It gets so awkward when people tell me to wipe my chin, but it helps me from acting like a baby. Dad used to get on me, and I told him I just couldn’t control it. No, my dad wasn’t mean. He always supported me and wanted me to do my best. He just wanted me to control my drooling. I know drooling is not what I want to see, so I understand why people don’t like it.
     During the cold, my chin will get red and hurt. I prefer not to cover my face in cold weather, as it can result in moisture accumulation from drooling, which may cause my clothing to become damp. I use ChapStick when I think about it.
      When I was in vocational rehab, my teacher suggested that wearing a wristband would help to wipe my chin. I love that idea and I have been wearing one ever since. I experimented with colored wristbands to coordinate with my outfits, but my chin would always get irritated whenever I wore them. Because of this, I now only use white wristbands.
     There are medications to control drooling, but I want to see better than have a dry chin. I had tried medicine twice, and both times, I had blurred vision. From what I understand, the medication dries out all the saliva in your body, which leads to problems. It controlled my drooling, but I had trouble working on the computer and reading. It’s discouraging when my drool flows like a fountain, and I want to try another medicine, but I know it might irritate my eyes.
     I get so embarrassed when I choke over my saliva. At home when I feel a cough, I have to give it my all to clean my throat. It sounds like I’m dying, but it is the only way I can get rid of it. If I can’t, I will cough for a while. When I try to hide my cough in public, it only gets worse. I keep a towel in my wheelchair when I’m in church. In church, when I felt a cough, I used to point at my parents’ pocket for Werther’s coffee candy. Now I’m keeping some in my church’s bag. I don’t know why that candy doesn’t scare me in my mouth like other hard candy does.
      With CP, my lungs are weak too. I never had my lungs explained to me until I saw a doctor for a prescription for a talker. When he treated me as a normal person, I told Dad that I wanted to change doctors. The doctor wanted me to get a flu shot, but I said no. He explained how Cerebral Palsy people’s lungs are not strong enough to manage the flu. He even told me he would have to put me in the hospital if I got the flu or pneumonia. Right then, I will take any shot that is recommended. I don’t know why he scared me with my lungs, but it worked. When COVID shots came out, I couldn’t understand why disable people couldn’t get it with the seniors.
      I really don’t protect myself. I know I should, but I love people too much. To me, germs are everywhere. I wore masks when it was requested. I try to touch nothing in the doctor’s office. I get my shots when they are due.
     I got off of my subject, but I cough when things go down wrong. I normally manage my food ok. If I drink too fast, I will get strangled. What mortified me the most is my cough can just pop out. I have no warning!! It seems I can’t feel a cough coming on, and I don’t have time to cover my mouth. People have been washed by me.